The Reclamation Business - overcoming regrets
Regret doesn’t have to hold us back
This is what happened when someone (who will remain nameless) dropped a full six-pinter of milk. It exploded spectacularly. I was tempted to spoon it straight into my cereal bowl but prudently decided that it was beyond reclaiming.
How do you react to spilt milk? “Don’t cry!” says the proverb. Fine if it’s just milk but what about the stuff of life is beyond reclamation - those moments that we’d love to rewind but can’t?
Can you defiantly sing, “I regret nothing!”? I can’t. I know the taste of regret, the sound of “if only” that echoes in darker moments. And I’m not the only one – after all, what’s a midlife crisis but a severe bout of regret?
Some regrets are false. One of my greatest wrestles since Trevor’s death was that I hadn’t spotted that he was ill. I know that’s common to those who are suddenly bereaved. You retrace every moment to check you didn’t miss something. I’ve had to trust that God missed nothing, that his grace is bigger.
You, God, see the trouble of the afflicted;
you consider their grief and take it in hand. V14
God takes our grief tenderly in hand to give us a way forward out of regret. Instead of feeling robbed over the past, we can trust our future to his loving, re-creating hands.
What do you regret? What might have been? Moth-eaten years? Decades frittered away watching tat on TV? Parenting failures? Broken relationships? Risks you didn’t take? Gifts you didn’t give?
Praise God who meets all our regrets with a new day. Paul writes, Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret. 2 Cor 7:10
Don’t confuse regret with godly sorrow. Regret drags us backwards. Godly sorrow brings us forward. It leads us to repent and we find that not only does our loving Saviour forgive us, he gives us a new “concern and readiness to see the right thing done” (v11). We don’t cry over spilt milk; we start to clear it up before it turns rancid.
I love it that the Lord rolls up his sleeves to join us in clearing up the mess. That’s what he did on the Cross. He didn’t leave us in it. God is in the reclamation business. One day ALL will be restored but, meanwhile, he helps us move on. Instead of regret, God gives us confidence that things can be different.
Despite all the ways the Corinthian church messed up, Paul calls them to look forward and twice repeats, “I have complete confidence in you!” Today, God says to us, “I have full confidence in you! Will you put your confidence in me?”
As I look forward, I’m trying to avoid future regret by getting my head down to write my new book, so will be posting less in the coming weeks. I would hugely value your prayers! As for you, what helps you handle regret? How are you going to avoid future regrets? As you look ahead, don’t let regret drag you back.
